Assertion #5:New Year's Resolutions make me feel bad about myself.

It's the start of another year.  Somehow we made it through another one despite the threat of certain doom from various contemporary and ancient sources.  And although I'm thankful to be alive at the end of this tumultuous year, there is one thing I hate about the new year.  A new year always makes me feel bad about myself.

 A new year means a time of reflection and evaluation, then setting the dreaded New Year's Resolution.  I don't know how you are, but I am really hard on myself.  When asked, I struggle to come up with strengths but I'm ready to tell you all my weaknesses.  It is a problem I have always had, and as a kid it meant at certain things I tried harder.  Like basketball, I was a short kid who was told that I probably shouldn't go out for the team next year.  And with true Michael Jordan flair (sometimes I overstate things) I came back the next year as the starting point guard of an undefeated team.  Basketball became my obsession because I was told I was bad at it.  I knew my weaknesses on the court and always did my best to work on them.  That didn't really get me anywhere, but it is a way my personality flaw worked to my advantage.  (Some would say that was more of a pride/proving people wrong issue, but whatever)

So as I look at myself in the mirror and reflect on what could change in my life, I always dwell on the negative.  Then, my self-esteem goes down.  Because over time, my determination and resolve have gotten weaker while self nit-picking has gotten stronger.  I've nearly defeated myself.  Then, I just start to feel bad about myself, and this whole New Year's thing starts to smell like my childhood home on liver and onion day, absolutely gag-worthy! (Sorry, Mom.)

So this year, while I will be trying to work to improve on some things, I am going to start thinking more about my strengths.  I've beaten myself up for my weaknesses enough.  It is time to concentrate on what I do well, and reflect on those things, so that while I'll occasionally give in to dwelling on my weaknesses, I won't forget that I'm actually do some things quite well.  This is the year that I will focus on the positive in my life instead of worrying about the negative.

What are your resolutions or goals for this coming year?  Upon what are you going to improve this year?  Of what are going to rid?  (I'm working on the don't-end-sentences-with-a-preposition syndrome this year, but it makes questions seem awkward.)